My original No More Abandoned Carts script
Here's some weekend fun for loyal SSL Blog readers.
Back before VeriSign launched the award-winning Cart Whisperer viral campaign, we were toying with various ideas. We always intended the anchor of the campaign to be a highly entertaining, breakthrough video that called attention to the social evil that is abandoned shopping carts. As with the final treatment, the video would direct viewers to the No More Abandoned Carts site. At one point I personally scripted a candidate concept before one of our writers eventually provided the script that went on to be viewed more than five million times.
I recently discovered my script, reread it, and decided that I still like it quite a bit. So I thought I'd share. Have fun.
EXT. BUSTLING SUPERMARKET PARKING LOT - DAY
This was the scene in the early days of the twenty-first century, humans and shopping carts living together in harmony, each fulfilling its destiny. These were the golden days of man-cart cooperation as they lived hand-in-handle.
EXT. STREET - DAY
A lone shopping CART sits by the side of the road.
But as early as the late 1990s, everything began to change. A disturbing trend grew up. Abandoned shopping carts, unable to serve their purpose of delivering purchased goods to consumers, appeared on the scene.
EXT. STREET- NIGHT
A jumbled group of CARTS in a parking lot, slightly ominous.
As these sad, lost cart souls collected in increasing numbers, the societal problem they represented became clear. Carts began to roam the streets in huge misplaced numbers. Packs of aimless abandoned carts competed with human occupants for control of the asphalt.
STOCK PHOTO OF ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGAR
In 2015 President Schwarzeneggar declared martial cart law, but by then it was too late.
INT. MALL - DAY
A shopping CART lies on its side, four ADULTS beating it with BASEBALL BATS and HOCKEY STICKS.
Open cart-on-man warfare broke out across the Western world.
EXT. WOODS - DAY
A shopping cart moves slowly along a dirt PATH, wobbling from side to side.
With a sudden cry a group of dirty-faced ragged PEOPLE jump out of the underbrush, brandishing ROCKS and thick STICKS.
Eventually humans fled the urban centers to the hills and forests, where their ambulatory prowess gave them greater advantage over their wheeled nemeses.
KEN BURNS-STYLE PAN ACROSS STILL PHOTO OF TIMES SQUARE
The famous view of Times Square but devoid of people and cars. Instead shopping CARTS fill the street and sidewalks.
And in the cities and suburbs, the paved places, shopping carts reigned supreme.
INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
A WELL-USED SHOPPING CART, weathered but in good condition, sits on its wheels in front of a half dozen SMALL SHOPPING CARTS, all shiny and new. We see that the older shopping cart is the one who has been providing this narrative so far.
As we do, to this day. So drink your WD-40, little ones, and if you go to sleep without giving me any trouble, tomorrow I'll tell you about how we took over Chicago.
GO TO BLACK
Don't let this happen to you. Fight abandoned shopping carts today!